29 weeks

It's hard to believe I only have 11 weeks until the due date. That seems like such a very long time. I keep thinking, "That's the WHOLE summer" and "That's almost like a semester" or "If it were 11 weeks until Christmas, I wouldn't even think about it." But this is so different than all that. It's not just 11 weeks until the summer ends, or 11 weeks until the semester ends, or 11 weeks until Christmas. This is 11 weeks until my life will never be the same. It seems like not enough time.

Everything is still going smoothly, I think. I had a doctor's appointment on Friday, and my blood sugar was normal, I'm not anemic, and Dresden is still growing at the proper rate. I've gained about 20 to 22 pounds, depending on the day. I've decided to stop weighing myself compulsively--really really this time. I was not eating properly or healthily and old body image issues started creeping up again. It's a cruel fact that eating disorders typically intensify during childbearing years and peak during pregnancy. And it's something they should tell you so you're not caught completely unaware. I want Dresden to be strong and healthy, and the logical part of my brain would rather overfeed him than underfeed him, but it's a constant struggle. I've started keeping track of what and when I eat to make sure I snack every few hours. I can't eat a real meal because I feel so very uncomfortably full after, and I swear Dresden can kick my stomach (the organ itself, not just the generalized belly area). So...a bagel here, an apple an hour or so later. All I wanted yesterday was a Panera cinnamon crunch bagel with hazelnut cream cheese. I think I need some more protein.

Dresden is extra active these days, and I love trying to figure out what he's doing. I'm sometimes surprised by how quickly he can move, mostly because I imagine him swimming around as if my uterus were a pool and I know you can't move like that underwater, but then I remember that he's now about 15 inches long and weighs over two and a half pounds. He might have had a whole lot of room a few months ago, but I think it's starting to get more like a small tub and less like a swimming pool in there. The kicks, rolls, punches, headbutts, and stretches all make more sense if I remember that he's not the size of an apple anymore. See?

He can and does move much more quickly and with much more force than I anticipated. Sometimes I think something is wrong, but if I visualize my insides like the above picture, it's less troublesome. It's all pretty amazing, actually. When he's really awake, I can feel him everywhere--close to my side, at the very top of my belly, all the way to the bottom. I think he'll be able to give my ribs a solid thwacking in a week or two. Exciting times.

OKAY! Here's my picture for today. This is why Dallas calls me Hair Monster when we get up.